Grasping Air

I miss my past. When everything was simple and happiness was easy. It changed when I started to define what joy was. I never understood that it's only real when you're in that moment only. It's when you laugh carelessly with friends, when you share sunrises with them. When conversations are random, yet judgement was non-existent.When you sing and they grab your microphone.

Then...you all age. They say with age comes wisdom. But I realize age blurs lines that matter. When we start to distinguish joy from real happiness, problems from the mundane, future and what we make of it. It's a sad realization that is inevitable, I guess.

Life is journey so they say. It's the ride that matters, not the destination.No used crying over spilled milk, or those that we actually drank. Still,it's gone. No taking it back. Like our lives that we shared with people. People that are now estranged. People who we'll be having superficial conversation from hereon. People we actually cherish and love.

At least we share memories. Nothing lasts forever anyway.Even friends. We keep what we have and move on. And know that in our hearts, we were all happy. To cling to the past would be riduculouos, maybe even disastrous for us.

But still, right now, at this very moment, with this extreme level of nostalgia, I want to be able to live like that again. Like nothing changed.

Though I know, it's only grasping air.